Wednesday, April 4, 2012

From a former fetus

Dear Republicans,

This may come as a shock to you - seeing as how I grew up to be a woman - but I, too, was once a fetus.

Before I was a meddlesome, opinionated slut who just wants you to get your grubby paws off my health care and basic human rights, I, too, was a tiny cluster of cells, imbued with all the rights and dignities you’d like to subscribe to current fetuses.

So why do you think I no longer deserve those rights? Now that I’m no longer a fetus, why do I no longer have the right to life? The right to dignity and autonomy? Why do you no longer recognize me as a person? Because if you did, you would understand that I have a right to be free from your religious oppression and your antiquated patriarchal bullshit. You would understand that I have a right to access legal, necessary medical care.

When I was just a wee embryo, you were concerned about my well-being. About my existence. The potential I would bring with me into the world. Now that I’m here, you just want me back in the kitchen.

Where did we go wrong? Was it when my spermatozoan failed to contain a Y chromosome? I do apologize for that, but I fear I would be remiss if I did not point out that you yourself would not exist if your mother’s two X chromosomes hadn’t made her female and therefore capable of bearing a child.

I wish we could go back to those days. Back to when I paid no taxes, voted in no elections and had no need to continuously fight for the rights I’ve already been granted.

You loved me as a fetus, now love me as a fully-formed, educated and worthwhile woman. And for fuck’s sake, stop trying to take away my rights. They are not open to negotiation.

Former fetus-love,

Angry Maiden 


  1. This should be submitted to local government officials.

    1. haha thanks. But can they read...? They certainly cant seem to read the Constitution...