Dear Republicans,
This may come as a shock to you - seeing as how I grew up to
be a woman - but I, too, was once a fetus.
Before I was a meddlesome, opinionated slut who just wants
you to get your grubby paws off my health care and basic human rights, I, too,
was a tiny cluster of cells, imbued with all the rights and dignities you’d
like to subscribe to current fetuses.
So why do you think I no longer deserve those rights? Now
that I’m no longer a fetus, why do I no longer have the right to life? The right
to dignity and autonomy? Why do you no longer recognize me as a person? Because
if you did, you would understand that I have a right to be free from your religious
oppression and your antiquated patriarchal bullshit. You would understand that
I have a right to access legal, necessary medical care.
When I was just a wee embryo, you were concerned about my
well-being. About my existence. The potential I would bring with me into the
world. Now that I’m here, you just want me back in the kitchen.
Where did we go wrong? Was it when my spermatozoan failed to
contain a Y chromosome? I do apologize for that, but I fear I would be remiss
if I did not point out that you yourself would not exist if your mother’s two X
chromosomes hadn’t made her female and therefore capable of bearing a child.
I wish we could go back to those days. Back to when I paid
no taxes, voted in no elections and had no need to continuously fight for the
rights I’ve already been granted.
You loved me as a fetus, now love me as a fully-formed,
educated and worthwhile woman. And for fuck’s sake, stop trying to take away my
rights. They are not open to negotiation.
Former fetus-love,
Angry Maiden
This should be submitted to local government officials.
ReplyDeletehaha thanks. But can they read...? They certainly cant seem to read the Constitution...
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